It's kind of funny how "themes" pop up in our lives. Maybe we look for patterns. Or rather, we recognize the patterns. One that I've noticed, lately, is how the concept of “intuition” keeps showing up.
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Is Social Media Really Social? Rarely does a day go by where I do not read something about the value of developing relationships on social media. It gives you the opportunity to reach many people every time you post something on Facebook, LinkedIn, Google+ or one of the numerous other sites available to you. It seems like everyone is involved in sharing – whether it is important information or not. Some people have thousands of followers or “friends” online that they communicate with every day. On the surface, there is value to being more connected to family members, friends, and business associates. It breaks down the barriers of distance and time by allowing you to communicate with each other 24/7. Even so, what is meant to connect people at a higher level could actually be isolating them as well. I say this because participating in social media can arguably be more passive than active especially from the standpoint of not having a two-way conversation in real time. You cannot touch the person. Feel his/her presence in the room. Or share information in the most meaningful way. Social media (and texting) takes away the need to talk to one another, just as the telephone took away the need to visit someone. Everything you need to know is online. Although we are more accessible than ever before, is it working for us or against us? Some might agree, social media is taking the place of spending quality time with family, friends, and associates. How often do you see a group of people eating dinner in a restaurant with one or more of them posting, tweeting, or texting? Or, are in a meeting with someone who is paying more attention to the conversation on their smart phone rather than you? Or, not able to get someone on the phone …who sends you a text almost immediately after you leave a voice mail…instead of returning your call? Isolation or just not “being present in the moment” can lead to loneliness which has a dramatic impact on a person’s level of energy – the lonelier or less aware the person feels, the less likely that he/she will be motivated into action. Social interaction is important to everyone’s well-being. One could argue that loneliness and being alone is not the same thing. Some people are perfectly content being by themselves. Even so, social media, as well as many other online applications, has reduced the need to meet in person and, with that, the ability to form a meaningful bond with another person. Over the past 25 years, there has been a dramatic decrease in the number of confidants or quality social connections in a person’s life. One survey found that the average number of personal confidants has decreased from three people in 1985 to two in 2004 and only one today. A 2010 AARP survey found that 35% of people older than 45 were chronically lonely, as opposed to 20% of a similar group a decade earlier. Try something novel the next time you want to go online to interact. Pick up the phone or stop by someone’s house or office instead. I am always grateful to have a conversation with someone in person. It gives me the opportunity to express myself in a way that cannot be captured behind a computer. Be social outside of social media. The power of the spoken word is amazing. How have you been successful in balancing your social interactions, whether in person or virtual? Please share below! Zackarie Lemelle Managing Partner, Leadership Engagement Services Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC)
I was sitting in a pizzeria the other day. It was later than the usual lunchtime rush, so the crowd had died down. There were eight or nine of us having lunch. I’ve been traveling a lot lately, so I was using the time to catch up on the numerous emails that piled up. As I’m sure you know, they can quickly get unwieldy. So, I’m sitting there, gnoshing on my pizza and typing away on my tablet, when a couple of “business casual” dressed guys came in.
I find it interesting how frequently living creatures tolerate discomfort and pain. I include myself in this group. Many years ago, I suffered a fairly severe injury to my rotator cuff. It still bothers me to this day.
I find it interesting how frequently living creatures tolerate discomfort and pain. I include myself in this group. Many years ago, I suffered a fairly severe injury to my rotator cuff. It still bothers me to this day. Some days I forget about it, some days it’s fairly painful, but the injury lingers. I’ve consulted doctors whose prognoses for surgical improvement span from mildly better range of movement and decrease of pain to good improvement in both areas. I’ve decided to deal with the occasional discomfort of the injury rather than have surgery. Hey, my baseball days are long behind me anyway. I know I’m not alone in this decision. How many times have you had a toothache or tennis elbow and not gone to the doctor until it got to a point where you couldn’t tolerate it any longer? Right. We’ve all been there. Many of us have also been in that situation with our behaviors, too. Perhaps you’ve had a job that was unfulfilling, or had a bad habit you wanted to ditch, or were in a relationship that wasn’t healthy. Often, we remain in these places way longer than we should. We tolerate the pain and trudge along miserably or wait until it becomes unbearable to finally make a change. It doesn’t need to be that way. Get Your Head Out of the Sand One of the first steps to making a change is to stop ignoring the problem. Pretending things will just get better is a sure way to ensure that they won’t. In fact, not only is time being wasted in a painful place, things will probably get worse. Start Small We need to stare our problems in the eye if we’re going to combat them. Major changes don’t occur in one monumental stroke. It takes time. You’re not going to go from a sedentary, out-of-shape routine to running a marathon just because you’ve finally decided to change. But maybe, instead of grabbing fast food for dinner, you make a healthy meal instead. That’s a small step down the path. Get Some Help I guarantee you others have been exactly where you are and made a change. Seek them out. If you’re looking to make a career change, seek out others who have done it. If they aren’t in your immediate social circle, then look for them online. There is a wealth of free resources available that are only a click away. Believe Some of the greatest life changes have been accomplished by average folks who simply committed to making a change and believed, in their core, that they would. You don’t realize how strong you are and how much you can achieve when you refuse to let doubt derail you. Get that negative self-talk out of your head and out of your life. All it does is hold you back. Get Up You’re going to face some obstacles that may trip you up. That’s OK. Get up. Dust yourself off. And, get back on track. You can do this! I’d love to hear about how you decided to make a change and how you did it. Post your success story, so others can learn from YOUR experience. Live on Fire! Luke Iorio, CPC, PCC, ELI-MP President & CEO Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC)